Real Dialogue for Difficult Conversations
Who is Real Dialogue for? Bring your co-parent, your partner, co-worker, your roommate, your friend, your fellow board member, and/or your parent or adult child. Private Sessions, 2 Person Facilitation and Group Facilitation While Real Dialogue facilitation is most often offered to support two people to hear each other, you can also talk through a conflict with Abbi on your own, or bring in your whole business team, family or housing community. Cost: Real Dialogue is offered on a sliding scale of $80-500 per session. (Lower sliding scales and BIPOC & LGBTIQA+ solidarity discounts available.) Real Dialogue corporate rate is $350-500/hour (Rate is based on number of participants and number of hours required). Time Container: Real Dialogue sessions with two or more people are 2 hours. Real Dialogue private sessions are 1 hour.
|
When being human, conflict is bound to happen. Real Dialogue offers skills and a way of talking that can shift difficult conversations into generative conflict and understanding. The skills of Real Dialogue are Speak for Yourself, Listen Mindfully and Remain Curious. During a Real Dialogue facilitated session, you will sit across from the person you came to have a conversation with. The Real Dialogue Specialist will coach you in practicing the skills, as well as offer other techniques to support your process.
Ultimately, one goal is to take home the skills of Real Dialogue.
|
Real Dialogue aims for differentiation and witnessing, not for compromise or solutions. Our objective in Real Dialogue is respectful conflict and the ability to see, hear, and feel both self and other within the conflict. Learning the philosophies behind Real Dialogue have made a world of difference in Abbi's own life. Sharing Real Dialogue and seeing the shifts that it has made possible in others has touched her heart. Abbi would be honored to support you. Since discovering Real Dialogue in 2022, Abbi has made Real Dialogue her main private practice offering. |
"Abbi - I don’t have words for how much I appreciate what you did tonight.
The way you were willing to dive with us, into our shit! I am so grateful and inspired by you! I really like Real Dialogue. I definitely feel heard about the issue I came to talk about for the first time. You are truly skilled. It is wild to see how our confirmation bias and our negativity bias affects our experience of our reality. Wow. My eyes are more open after seeing it in action. Thank you." ~Kimberly Pierce, she/her |
"I loved the Real Dialogue session I had with my partner, Martha. The process took a sticky conflict that was starting to build into reactive resentment and transformed it so we could really see each other. I feel closer and more intimate with Martha since our session. I am feeling less reactive regarding the conflict. It brought us back to connection. Abbi is a skilled and compassionate facilitator. I felt held by her in every way." - Mollie McElroy (she/her) |
Frequently Asked Questions:
Who has Abbi done Real Dialogue with so far? Since Abbi began offering Real Dialogue, she has offered it to couples, new parents, co-parents navigating divorce, roommates, parents and adult children, people who live on land together and many others. Some of these conversations have been on conflicts that arose around issues of class difference and/or race difference. She has offered Real Dialogue in large corporations for teams that go off track and/or who need a boost in communicating with each other. She has also offered live demonstrations to organizations and supported them in practicing the skill for particular issues. She also practices the skills as much as possible in her own life and is an ever ready student to learn the ways she can improve her interpersonal communication. Abbi main focus is on using Real Dialogue to support interpersonal communication, though it is also used to support people with very different viewpoints to hear each other (for example: pro-life/pro-choice, pro-vaccine/anti-vaccine).
What are the skills of Real Dialogue again? The skills of Real Dialogue are Speak for Yourself, Listen Mindfully and Remain Curious.
Can you tell me more about Real Dialogue? Real Dialogue is both a self-improvement skill and a method of facilitating difficult conversations. It counteracts our natural tendencies to create enemies when we feel unheard, unseen, or unknown. Real Dialogue draws on mindfulness, psychodrama, cognitive science, relational theory and psychoanalysis. It was founded by Polly Young-Eisendrath.
What does a session with two people look like? For two people who want to participate in a Real Dialogue facilitation, you can expect to sit across from each other. Abbi will take turns supporting each person in the conversation. The focus is on the two individuals having the conversation while Abbi serves as a background type coach. Abbi's roles are to facilitate the process, coach the skills, and to offer reflective listening when needed. Occasionally she will play other roles to support you to share what you want to be heard in, and to support you to hear what the other person would like share. If desired, you can request embodied homework assignments.
What does a session with multiple people look like? This session looks like the session with two people, except the rest of the participants will be witnessing the Real Dialogue and may or may not play other roles. The people in the chairs across from each other can rotate, though often there is only time for one or two pairs to occur in two hours. Corporations often book the whole day for multiple session to occur.
What does a session with one person look like? Abbi will listen to your conflict and share how you might think of the conflict using the skills of Real Dialogue. After listening initially, she will coach you to use the skills of Real Dialogue in how you talk about the conflict and offer reflections. If asked, she will bring in her somatic movement education and share about the somatic experience of trauma/resilience and the nervous system to support you in understanding yourself and/or the other person/people. If desired, she will offer embodied homework assignments to support awareness and integration.
Does Abbi ever meet with participants ahead of time? Abbi does not need to know the nature of a conflict before meeting with the folks who want to participate in Real Dialogue. Occasionally she will agree to meet with each party ahead of time. When working with a corporation, she will meet with the HR department or other designated person first to understand the scope of the assignment.
What are the skills of Real Dialogue again? The skills of Real Dialogue are Speak for Yourself, Listen Mindfully and Remain Curious.
Can you tell me more about Real Dialogue? Real Dialogue is both a self-improvement skill and a method of facilitating difficult conversations. It counteracts our natural tendencies to create enemies when we feel unheard, unseen, or unknown. Real Dialogue draws on mindfulness, psychodrama, cognitive science, relational theory and psychoanalysis. It was founded by Polly Young-Eisendrath.
What does a session with two people look like? For two people who want to participate in a Real Dialogue facilitation, you can expect to sit across from each other. Abbi will take turns supporting each person in the conversation. The focus is on the two individuals having the conversation while Abbi serves as a background type coach. Abbi's roles are to facilitate the process, coach the skills, and to offer reflective listening when needed. Occasionally she will play other roles to support you to share what you want to be heard in, and to support you to hear what the other person would like share. If desired, you can request embodied homework assignments.
What does a session with multiple people look like? This session looks like the session with two people, except the rest of the participants will be witnessing the Real Dialogue and may or may not play other roles. The people in the chairs across from each other can rotate, though often there is only time for one or two pairs to occur in two hours. Corporations often book the whole day for multiple session to occur.
What does a session with one person look like? Abbi will listen to your conflict and share how you might think of the conflict using the skills of Real Dialogue. After listening initially, she will coach you to use the skills of Real Dialogue in how you talk about the conflict and offer reflections. If asked, she will bring in her somatic movement education and share about the somatic experience of trauma/resilience and the nervous system to support you in understanding yourself and/or the other person/people. If desired, she will offer embodied homework assignments to support awareness and integration.
Does Abbi ever meet with participants ahead of time? Abbi does not need to know the nature of a conflict before meeting with the folks who want to participate in Real Dialogue. Occasionally she will agree to meet with each party ahead of time. When working with a corporation, she will meet with the HR department or other designated person first to understand the scope of the assignment.
Learn More About Real Dialogue
Real Dialogue is a humanizing method of facilitation that can break through defensiveness, polarization and conflict avoidance in difficult conversations.
Polarization is when it seems like there are two opposing sides. Webster defines polarization as 'two sharply distinct opposites. especially : a state in which the opinions, beliefs, or interests of a group or society no longer range along a continuum but become concentrated at opposing extremes.'
The Problem of Polarization:
Solution: Real Dialogue
Humanizing conflict and ending polarization through access to skills training, deep learning, and other resources that transform implicit bias, stereotyping and hostile polarization into:
Polarization is when it seems like there are two opposing sides. Webster defines polarization as 'two sharply distinct opposites. especially : a state in which the opinions, beliefs, or interests of a group or society no longer range along a continuum but become concentrated at opposing extremes.'
The Problem of Polarization:
- bias and stereotyping
- dehumanization and broken trust
- the inability to solve problems
- emotional threat that can undermine health
- loss of opportunities and resources
Solution: Real Dialogue
Humanizing conflict and ending polarization through access to skills training, deep learning, and other resources that transform implicit bias, stereotyping and hostile polarization into:
- renewed trust
- open communication
- discovery
- creativity
- improved productivity
*Create an account on the Real Dialogue ap
if you want to get lots of great resources for free.
if you want to get lots of great resources for free.